Wicked Awesome

Saturday night I did not win the New York Lottery.

I didn’t even buy a ticket.

But I did enter a competition with a prize package so exciting, it would make Bob Barker blush.

It’s called The Wicked Lottery.

As I learned Saturday, two hours before every production of Wicked, the legendary Broadway play, they hold a lottery where they award approximately 20 tickets to lucky fans.

Location of the seats?

Orchestra.

Front of the stage.

Cost?

$26.25 per ticket.

Say What?

Just click your heels three times and cross your fingers... and toes.   

To get as close to the Wicked Witch as Dorothy did, all you need is $26.25, in cash, and a little luck.

Well, a lot of luck.

I just happened to be walking by the Gershwin Theater, between 50th & 51st, around 5:50pm Saturday night.

I saw a crowd of what must’ve been at least 200 people.

So, like any tourist, I stopped.

As I got closer to the main entrance, I noticed a line at a table.

So I waited in that line.

When I got to the front, I put my name on a green index card, along with the number of tickets I would want if I win.

One.

Now this is not just any play we are talking about here.

This is Wicked.

The 17th longest running show in Broadway history.

HISTORY.

And at the rate they are selling tickets these days, its not gonna stop there.

More than five million people have seen the show on Broadway since it opened in 2003.

The show grosses more than a million dollars every week.

Last November, Wicked became the first show in Broadway history to gross over two million dollars in a week.

In all, Wicked is only the third musical in Broadway history to pass five hundred million dollars in total gross.

That’ll buy a lot of brooms.

Back to the lottery.

So I show up at the table to fill out my index card.

You would’ve thought the Soup Nazi was running the show.

Or Corey Hart.

This guy, wearing sunglasses at night, was barking out instructions like he didn’t want us to be there.

“Fill out the card.   Your full name and number of tickets you want.  You need cash and an I.D. with you..   When you are done, stand behind that green line.”

“YOU NEED CASH AND AN I.D. WITH YOU.”

He said it twice.

Everybody got the same exact treatment.

“Fill out the card.   Your full name and number of tickets you want.  You need cash and an I.D. with you..   When you are done, stand behind that green line.”

“YOU NEED CASH AND AN I.D. WITH YOU.”

Then at 6:00pm, SHARP, he closed the double glass doors to stop anyone else from entering.

Prepped the lottery wheel, which contained all of the index cards, and started spinning.

About five minutes later he came out and yelled at us.

“THANK YOU FOR COMING.   IF YOUR NAME IS CALLED, COME UP AND STAND TO MY RIGHT WITH YOUR I.D. AND CASH IN HAND.”

“IF YOU FILLED OUT TWO INDEX CARDS AND ARE CAUGHT, YOU WILL BE ESCORTED OFF THE PREMISES.”

Wow.

He’s just plain wicked.

Thank you, thank you very much.  

One-by-one, the names are announced.

And one-by-one, a sharp screetch is heard coming from somewhere in the crowd.

About three minutes later, the last name is called.

Without any mention of me.

Or at least 190 others.

At this point, all of the losers look around and mutter something like, “I never win these things.”

Meanwhile, a handful of people are standing in front of us with smiles so big their face is about to crack.

The winners await their golden ticket, while the rest of us move on.

Waiting for the next show.

And the next lottery.